


What It Is To Burn

by skywarrior108



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: AU, Angst, F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-02
Updated: 2016-10-02
Packaged: 2018-08-19 01:52:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8184557
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skywarrior108/pseuds/skywarrior108
Summary: What if Zuko was the favored child of Ozai and Azula was not? Role reversal, mostly Azula-centric.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is a rewrite of a story I started writing almost eight years ago. It was inspired by two oekaki sketches by kitsuK8: _[Good Azula](http://kitsuk8.deviantart.com/art/Good-Azula-101322768)_ and _[Evil Zuko](http://kitsuk8.deviantart.com/art/Evil-Zuko-oekaki-sketch-101121396)_.
> 
>  **Disclaimer:** I do not own _Avatar: The Last Airbender_. However, I do own this story. Enjoy!

The biting arctic air whips against Princess Azula’s face. Her hands grip the cool, metal railing of her ship’s deck as her golden eyes take in every detail of the icy, oceanic landscape. It’s getting dark and her crew will soon need to stop for the night, but right now she wants to put as much distance between herself and the Fire Nation as possible.

“Azula,” a voice calls out from behind her. The fall of quiet footsteps draws closer, but Azula doesn’t turn to look—instead choosing to keep her gaze out over the water. A warm hand falls on her back as its owner comes to stand beside her. Azula glances to her side to see gray eyes gazing at her imploringly. “Yolisa just finished making a delicious roast duck.”

“I’m not hungry, Ty Lee,” she replies, shrugging off her friend's hand.

“But you haven’t eaten all day,” Ty Lee argues gently.

“I told you I’m not hungry!” Azula snaps, amber eyes cutting to wounded gray. She feels a stab of guilt, but she refuses to consider it—quickly turning on her heels and making a straight line for her cabin and slamming the door behind her.

Her boots are heavy against the floor as she walks down the corridor. Azula’s jaw clenches and her hands tighten into fists. It’s becoming harder and harder to maintain control, and the last few weeks have been a massive exercise in restraint due to the unpleasant emotions and memories that creep along the edges of her mind. She’s barely talked to Ty Lee or her ship’s crew, instead trying to channel all that negative energy into practicing her firebending forms. And when she’s not doing that, Azula has attempted to keep a vigilant watch over the ocean waves, looking for any sign of the Avatar.

But tonight is different, and no amount of meditation or training can distract her.

Azula plops down heavily on her bed, running a hand through her long, black hair. It’s not as soft as it used to be, but certain luxuries simply can’t be afforded anymore. She catches a glance of herself in the mirror before quickly looking away. She closes her eyes and unconsciously brings her left hand up to her face. Her fingers brush lightly against her cheek. The skin is rougher there. Scarred. _Don’t cry,_ she tells herself, dropping her hand and clenching it into a fist, willing the tears not to fall.

A year ago today, she was banished from the Fire Nation with nothing more than an old steam ship, a crew consisting of a dozen of her uncle’s most loyal soldiers, her best friend, and a hopeless quest: to capture the Avatar, who hasn’t been seen in over a hundred years.

Azula’s not stupid. She knows her father was looking for any excuse to be rid of her. He’s hated her since the day she was born.

* * *

_“Prince Ozai,” the doctor begins gravely._

_Ozai glances down at his young son—all of two years old and playing on the floor with wooden blocks—before getting up from his seat._

_“Is everything alright?” he asks, bringing his gaze to meet the doctor’s, a worried expression overtaking his features._

_“I’m afraid there has been a complication. Princess Ursa has suffered from severe blood loss while in labor. She has gone into hypovolemic shock. She isn’t going to make it.”_

_Ozai’s golden eyes flash with anger as he grabs the doctor by the front his shirt and shakes him, anger and panic rising up faster than a volcanic eruption._

_“Please, your highness,” the doctor pleads, but Ozai can’t hear him over his own fear and heartbreak and rage. Heat emanates from his palms, causing the doctor’s collar to smoke slightly, but Ozai barely notices._ “ _We’ve done everything we can.”_

_“Do more,” he insists, desperate and not wanting to lose Ursa. He pushes the doctor further into the wall. “Save her.”_

_“We can’t,” the doctor laments, fear shining from wide, brown eyes. “She… she’s already gone.”_

_“No…” Ozai swallows. “NO!” he shouts as the pain from knowing he’s lost his wife forever rises up in him. Baring his teeth, he swallows thickly. “Bring her back.”_

_“I can’t.”_

_“Then you die too,” he growls, before swiftly ending the doctor’s life with a fire dagger to the heart._

_But there’s no relief. No solace. Just an unbearable ache and anger in the wake of Ursa’s death._

* * *

_Prince Iroh steps out into the courtyard of the palace, finding his brother sitting under the large tree next to the pond. It’s been a week since Princess Ursa’s passing, but time has only seemed to make Ozai more bitter. He still hasn’t laid eyes on his newborn daughter, and if it weren’t for their father, Fire Lord Azulon, for whom Azula was named, Iroh has no doubt that Ozai would have destroyed her._

_Still, Iroh knows he needs to try. He knows the pain of losing his wife—the person who understood him better than anyone and who he loved more than the Fire Nation itself—but there’s more to live for. He just needs to help Ozai see it._

_Settling on the ground across from his brother, Iroh gazes at Ozai, who is glaring morosely at the stagnant water. “Don’t you want to see your daughter?” he asks after a moment._

_Ozai doesn’t answer. He doesn’t even so much as look at him._

_Iroh sighs, but his brother’s reaction to pain and loss is so different from his own that he has trouble understanding, and he feels his own anger well up._ _“Ozai, Azula is your child and she needs you.”_

_“Don't lecture me, Iroh,” he bites back, those golden eyes cutting toward Iroh. “I’m not in the mood for your nonsense."_

_"What nonsense?” Iroh asks, throwing his hands up, not at all deterred. “How can you be so cruel?”_

_“It’s all her fault that I lost my wife. If it wasn’t for her, Ursa would still be here!” Ozai snaps, his eyes darkened by rage._

_“How can you say that, Ozai? She is only a baby.”_

_“If you care so much, then why don't you take care of her?!” Ozai shouts, jumping to his feet before storming back into the palace._

_Stunned, Iroh stares after him sadly, hoping that eventually his brother will come to his senses, but inwardly dreading that he won’t._

* * *

Like every day before this one, Azula wakes at the crack of dawn. There’s a comfort she finds in rising with the sun—a kind of solar sympathy. The sun does not judge or hate her. The sun nourishes and strengthens her.

Azula steps out onto the deck, the air around her fogging with each breath that she expels. Dropping into her root stance, she begins to move through her firebending katas one by one, slowly increasing the difficulty as her body starts to wake up, allowing her chi to flow more smoothly through her body.

Coming into her final form, Azula points the index and middle fingers of both hands, circling her arms and drawing them in toward her heart, feeling a pure, powerful surge of energy flow into her belly. Then, stepping forward with her right leg, she sends her right arm out, unleashing a bolt of blue lightning.

“I don’t think I’ll ever not be amazed by your lightning bending,” she hears Ty Lee say from behind her.

There’s a warmth that remains low in Azula’s belly, and she’s not sure if it’s from the remnants of lightning or from Ty Lee’s words. Regardless, she can’t stop her lips from curving up into a soft smile as she turns to look at her best friend.

Ty Lee’s awed smile is the first thing Azula takes in, and not for the first time, she’s amazed at her friend’s ability to always keep a smile on her face, no matter how dire things seemed to be.

“Are you feeling better today, Azula?”

“A bit,” she replies, but contrition lingers. “Listen, about last ni-”

Azula stops talking suddenly, her eyes catching something to the south that distracts her. Ty Lee follows her gaze to see a huge shaft of white-blue light shooting straight into the heavens, and Azula almost forgets to breathe. After a few seconds, the light dissipates.

“Now _that_ was amazing!” Ty Lee exclaims. “I wonder what it was?”

“Whatever it was, it came from a powerful source,” Azula realizes.

“A powerful source? Do you think it’s the Avatar?” Ty Lee asks excitedly.

“I don’t know,” Azula replies, trying not to get her hopes up. “But there’s only one way to find out.”

At least it’s something to do, she tells herself, but she's unable to stop her silent prayers to whatever spirits might be listening. Azula so badly wants this to be the beginning of her redemption.

Turning back to the ship’s helmsman, she shouts out an order, “Set a course for the light!”

He offers Azula a short salute before changing the direction of their ship and heading due south.

Less than an hour later, a flare shoots up in the air followed by a loud boom, grabbing the attention of all on board the princess’s vessel. Azula, ever-dutifully standing at the forward deck, brings her spyglass up to her right eye and looks toward the direction of the flare.

Her breath catches in her throat as her heart picks up its pace. Two figures—more specifically, one figure holding another—are hopping down from the remnants of an old Fire Nation battleship trapped in ice and onto the frozen terrain of the South Pole. Azula’s never seen someone move with such lightness and agility—not even Ty Lee.

 _Is that really him?_ she asks herself. _Is that really the Avatar?_

But she knows in her gut that it’s him. It has to be. She’s never seen an airbender before, but she doubts anyone else could be so nimble.

She tracks his movements and notices his westward movement, and so she shifts her spyglass in that direction, where she spots a small Water Tribe village. _Is this been where he’s been hiding all these years? How did the Southern Raiders not notice him? No matter. He’s mine now._

“Helmsman, steer the ship to that village,” Azula commands, pointing in its direction and feeling her anticipation grow. _I’ve found him. I’ve found the Avatar._


	2. Chapter 2

Azula stands stock still as Ty Lee fixes the last plates of her armor in place.

“All set,” she murmurs, taking a step back and looking at Azula with something that resembles reverence.

“Thank you,” Azula replies just as quietly before turning her gaze forward, knowing that they’re close to making landfall.

She suddenly jerks forward, and the sound of metal colliding with ice fills Azula’s ears as she tries to regain her balance. She feels deft hands wrap around her upper arms to hold her steady, but despite the part of her that yells to shove Ty Lee off, a greater part of her accepts the assistance being offered to her.

Clenching her jaw, Azula presses her feet against the floorboards, eager for this ship to come to a stop. Soon enough, the bowsprit opens up and lowers down. A long burst of steam expels from the ship as it does.

Azula, Ty Lee, and four guards wait at the top of the bowsprit for the steam to clear before exiting the ship. Azula is wearing warm, red pants and a matching long-sleeved shirt, covered by her black battledress and black armor. Her hair is pulled up into a topknot with long bangs in front. Ty Lee is also wearing warm pants and a long-sleeved shirt—rose pink, of course—but forgoing the armor in order to allow her body freedom to move. Her guards are wearing similar armor to Azula—the only difference being the helmets on their heads.

As the steam clears, Azula begins to walk down the steps of the bowsprit with her entourage right behind her. Her amber eyes take in the sight of the small village, filled with nothing more than igloos. Brow furrowing, she turns her attention onto the villagers who have gathered in what looks to be the village center. They all appear to be only women and children, all huddled together and staring at her with fear, no one daring to make a sound.

Frustration builds in Azula as she scans the villagers. There is only one elderly person among them, but she’s obviously not the Avatar.

Without warning, the air cracks with an adolescent war cry. Azula catches sight of a warrior boy—covered in face paint and holding a club—charging towards her. He raises his weapon, but as he goes to strike, Azula easily knocks the club from his hands. She follows with a knee to the gut, before tossing him over the right side of the plank, where he falls head first into the snow.

Azula hears Ty Lee giggle behind her as they continue walking down the bowsprit. There’s an audible intake of breath as her feet touch the ground—the villagers tensing as they eyed her warily. Out of the corner of her eye, she notices the warrior boy—his back to her—shaking the snow off himself before picking up his weapon once more. She mentally rolled her eyes. _He has to be by far the worst warrior I’ve ever seen,_ she thinks as she prepares for another possible “attack.”

He turns to face her, but he doesn’t strike. Instead he simply stands there, rooted to the ground, staring at her almost dumbstruck. Azula realizes then that he isn’t a threat and ignores him, turning her attention to an the old woman and a teenage girl, who she assumes is at least her age.

“Where is he?” she demands, stepping into their space.

No answer. Everyone continues to simply stare at her, obviously too afraid to speak, but this only serves to frustrate Azula.

“Who?” the defeated “warrior” boy asks, having finally found his voice and now walking in her direction.

“The airbender,” she replies, turning to face him. “I know that he’s here.”

“And what if he was? It’s not like there’s much you could do about it, seeing as you’re just a girl,” he says with a shrug.

Azula’s eyes flash at him dangerously, but he’s oblivious to the clear and present danger at hand, and that’s just how Azula likes it. Ty Lee tsk’s, shaking her head, knowing what’s coming. Azula clenches her hands into fists, a pair of fire daggers shooting out from them.

“Sokka, will you shut up!” the girl exclaims. “I’ve had it with your sexist attitude!”

“Oh, please, Katara,” Sokka retorts.

“Quiet, the both of you!” Azula orders, shooting blue fireballs from both palms, barely missing the tops of Sokka and Katara’s heads respectively. Sokka screams as he falls to the ground, and several of the children let out whimpers and cries in reaction.

Sokka gulps nervously as Katara looks at Azula with apprehension.

“That’s better,” Azula says, her voice calm as she let her hands fall to her sides. “Now, let's try this again. Where is the airbender?”

Just then, a young boy wearing monks robes with blue arrows tattooed on his body, skyrockets into the village on a penguin. As the animal comes to a stop, it sends snow flying up, covering the children of the village, causing them to cheer. The boy then hops off the penguin and points his staff in Azula’s direction.

“Looking for me?” he asks.

Azula looks at the boy oddly, struck by his youthful appearance, but she knows without a doubt that he is indeed the last airbender, despite the fact that he appears to be no older than twelve years old. “As a matter of fact, yes,” she replies before firing off a string of fire streams at him, which he barely blocks with his staff.

Just as she’s about to fire off another stream, he holds up his hand, “Wait!”

She pauses, but she doesn’t let her guard down. Not for a second. “What is it?”

“If I go with you, will you promise not to hurt these people?” he asks, throwing his staff to the ground in a gesture of surrender.

 _Well, that just made my job a whole lot easier,_ she thinks. “I promise.”

“Aang, no!” Katara shouts. “What do you want from him?” she demands, looking at Azula.

“The Avatar is a sworn enemy of the Fire Nation,” Azula informs her. A collective gasp among the villagers follows.

“Aang… you’re the Avatar?” Katara asks in part awe and part disbelief.

“No way,” Sokka murmurs.

Aang hangs his head somewhat shamefully. “Yeah.”

“You can’t just let them take you,” Katara insists as the guards closed in on Aang, shackling his arms behind him. One of the guards tosses the boy’s staff to Azula, and she easily catches it. She twirls it around a couple times, admiring its craftsmanship.

“Let’s go,” she orders after a moment as she and Ty Lee begin to walk back up the gangplank. The guards then roughly push Aang forward toward the ship.

“Don’t worry, Katara,” he says reassuringly as he looks back over his shoulder. “I'll be okay. Take care of Appa for me until I get back.”

The village can only watch as Aang and his Fire Nation captors disappear into the bow of Azula’s ship, and the gangplank lifts. Now inside the vessel, Azula holds her hand up for the guards to come to a halt, turning to regard the young Avatar thoughtfully for a moment.

She looks into gray eyes and the lack of judgment there is nothing but unnerving.

“Ty Lee,” Azula bites out then, gesturing with the index fingers on both hands, making it crystal clear what she wants her friend to do.

With two quick punches to the Avatar’s torso, Ty Lee blocks his chi—completely inhibiting his bending ability. Aang looks at them both somewhat fearfully, clearly sensing something has just gone wrong.

“What did you just do?” he asks before swallowing thickly and trying to put on a brave face.

“I blocked your chi, sweetie,” Ty Lee explains happily.

“Can't have you airbending onboard my ship, Avatar,” Azula adds with a smirk. “Take him to the brig,” she orders the guards before eyeing the staff appreciatively. “I'll be keeping this.”


End file.
